Wednesday, December 17, 2014

The Day I Made My Decision

The day I made my decision
I called JCW
On that very day
I searched my heart
And considered all the factors
Well, all but one.

Just one factor
The one we read about in the media
Never crossed my mind for a second
It had no influence over my decision

The media always paints the victim with a broad brush
As a money hungry, attention-starved nobody
Looking to ruin the life of a celebrity
As if sexual abuse could never be true

But the day I made my decision
When I called JCW
And said I’m ready, let’s do this
I want to confront my abuser
And expressed what I needed to make my life right again
I never spoke of money

I asked to protect society
And promised to preserve his family

I told him to go therapy
To heal himself, like he so badly needed
But I never asked for money

Because all a survivor really needs is closure. 

*JCW-Jewish Community Watch

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Jewish Community Watch

You ask why you should support JCW.

Let me tell you how JCW  supported me.

For over 2 years they had my back.

When I needed a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, words of advice, or the inspiration to keep on going, JCW was there for me.

When I thought I had gone mute, JCW helped me find my voice again.

When I thought I was too weak to get up and get it done, JCW offered a hand and lifted me up.

When I was scared and alone, JCW stood by my side and hugged me.

And I know I am not the only survivor that JCW has helped. There are so many of us that would not be where we are today without the help of JCW.

So please check out their website- it's new and improved.
It has amazing resources that everyone can benefit from.

Jewish Community Watch is saving lives everyday.
Support them and be on the right side of history.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Roadtrippin' My Heart

It’s been one whole year
365 days
12 long months
2 cities, 2 states
Crossing over 459 miles

But how do you measure emotions?
I’ve gone from numb to angry
I’ve been sad, I felt broken
Some days I was strong, like a warrior
I crossed the scale of emotions over and over

It’s like a road trip of sorts
This thing they call healing
My heart won’t follow any GPS or map
No estimated time of arrival 
It just does its own thing, in its own time

So when you ask me how I got here
Or how I am getting there
Well, there is no answer, to be honest
Each heart and soul takes its own journey
You just have to follow the route that works for you

Friday, October 31, 2014


locked up in my castle
you think I am rejecting you
but in reality, I am protecting you
both you 
and I 
I build up these castle walls
to get in is an impossible feat
only allowed to very few
the privileged
most trusted
sensitive souls
My heart seems 
the world thinks I do not care
but the cold bothers me
it's all I can do to keep from 
melting, thawing
and losing the power
But it's time to change
I can no longer hide
my past
it's dark
and scary
I'm haunted by these secrets
now I need to let it go
rise up and break the ice
test limits
break boundaries
let the world know
the frozen queen is silent no more

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Blessings for the New Year

I've been blessed with so much
More than so many
Really I should be ever so grateful

For every breath I take
And all the walks and runs
At least I am healthy and alive

For all the trips to beaches
Hikes in the woods
and summer days at the fair

For all the songs sung
And the beats I dance to
And the music I can hear

And grateful I am
But, oh, how I wish
For more, for better

There must be a higher purpose
To this face they call beautiful
That cannot smile or laugh

Will these deep brown eyes
Ever cease to cry
And twinkle with life?

So I pray and hope

For strength and joy,
Peace and serenity,
Healing and love

For me and all of you
May we be blessed with
A sweet and happy New Year

Sunday, September 7, 2014

These Demons

My nights have been filled with tears
Tears mourning over death
Tears wishing for death
Oh, the tears keep flowing

By day, I am consumed by the pain
Hoping for a respite
Yet, knowing it won't come
Dreading the next attack

The panic comes in waves
At times I am possessed
By a cool calm that is not me
But then my demons return

And they return with a vengeance
Not allowing for a moment of peace
They hold me tight
Until I can't breath anymore

My days turn into painful nights
and my nights to teary days
I'm living a nightmare
Unsure of day and night

These demons have captured me.