The Life

Let me tell you about life
the life of a survivor

A survivor who was a victim
and rose up to the challenge of life

A survivor who blossomed
in the face of trauma

A survivor who's every success
is a downfall for the abuser

A survivor who continues to live
even after you killed her

A survivor who thrives and grows
despite your attempts to stunt his growth

Because a survivor is a fighter
a warrior and a champion.

And that is a life worth living,
the life of a survivor.

Letting Go

Abuse; it's the shattering of ones heart and soul 

by a monster disguised as a human being

The pain of feeling the jagged edges poke into you 

as the pieces fall to the ground 

and the burning in your soul that follows.

But then you start healing.

looking at all the broken pieces laying around, 

you cry over what was and what could have been

yet commit to creating a masterpiece with those broken pieces.

And only then can you begin to love

love hands you the pieces and passes the glue 

so you can continue building and creating

Love shares in the joy of your accomplishments 

and holds you when the nightmares return.

Love whispers encouragement when your laying on the ground

and holds out its hand when you are ready to get back up

But love can only come when you learn to let go. 

Take Me Back

Take me back 
to innocent times
before I learned
of pain and abuse

Take me back 
and teach me
the words I need to know
what is right and what is wrong

Take me back
and hold my hand
protect me
with all you've got

Take me back
and don't leave me
until you are sure
that I will forever be safe

Take me back 
to more pleasant times
of sweetness and laughter
and lets stop the sun forever.

Moving Forward

I look in the mirror

Who am I

Am I a scared little girl

Am I a victim of abuse

Devastated and troubled

I used to think I was

I used to think that was my identity

That was the reflection I would see

But then I met you

And you changed me

You helped me see who I really am

Who I could be

A strong woman

A survivor

Proud and secure

So you taught me

And showed me

Through laughter and tears

Not to let my past define me

But to define it on my own terms

To hold the cards

And play the game

And be the boss in life

But then you left me

I cried and despaired

Who would show me now

Who would lead me

Take my hand as we carve a path

For ourselves in this crazy world

It was a tragic goodbye

No questions allowed

No time for answers

I prayed

And I hoped

Maybe one day you'll return

For that is my only comfort

That one day you will take heed of your own advice

Listen to your heart

Trust your instincts

Live life to the fullest

And acknowledge your feelings

Don't let your past define you

We all have a history

So lets forget what happened

Take my hand and we will walk together

Only moving forward

These Bandaged Wings

You came to me
You told me you need me

I told you to get away
For years I was yours
To do with as you pleased

Now I am free
Now I can say no

But you wouldn't take no
So you made me yours again
Your raped me and left me shaking

Please stop
Just get away, I beg

So you left
You disappeared
You got what you needed and jumped

Now I cannot move
I cannot breathe

What was once bandaged wings
Are now shattered beyond repair
As I lay here and cry

Gratitude

There's a silver lining

In every cloud

A rainbow

After every storm

A light

At the end of the tunnel

But most of all there's love

Love and friendship after pain

When friends and family come together

To help and protect the one they love

Its the unity

That strengthens their mission

Its the love

That combats the hatred

The beauty

That wipes away the ugliness

The good

That overtakes the bad

Its all this and more I am grateful for

Every single day

But most of all this year

Thank you for everything

Happy Thanksgiving!

My Deepest Desire

I am a person
a human being 

I am a soul
with feelings and emotions

I am a woman
who wishes and desires

I don't ask much
not for your love
not for your affection

I don't desire
your approval
nor your flattery

All I want
All we want
All anyone wants
is respect

It is not just a mere desire
It is my deepest desire

But it is more than that
It is a necessity

Like the air we breathe
The food we eat
And the water we drink

Every one of us needs respect

We are people, human beings 
And women with souls.